Greetings and welcome to another edition of the award winning Swami the Magazine! (Editor’s Note: He made up whatever award he thinks we won) This is Thanksgiving week and we all have plenty to be thankful for. This week we want to focus on your name. You may not think about it much, but your name could be worse than it is. To prove this, the staff at StM have scoured the record books for some of the strangest, most unfortunate, or just flat out dumbest names in the world of sports. So enjoy, and thank your parents! (Thanks Pop… Swami isn’t nearly as bad of a name as I thought it was as a kid!)
The Thanksgiving Picks!
Iowa v. Nebraska – This pick is completely irrational…Nebraska 24-21 – Jim Bob Cooter (coach for the Denver Broncos)
Missouri v. Arkansas – Arkansas 38-20 – Fair Hooker (former WR for the Cleveland Browns)
Baylor v. TCU – Baylor 38-35 – Jordin Tootoo (NHL player… actually wore #22 when he was in Detroit)
Georgia v. Georgia Tech – Georgia Tech +5 – Harry Colon (former DB for the New England Patriots) #THWG
Ohio State v. Michigan – Ohio State 33-31 – Kim Yoo Suck (South Korean Pole Vaulter)
Alabama v. Auburn – Alabama 30-28 – Longar Longar (Univ. of Oklahoma Basketball)
Ole Miss v. Mississippi State – Miss St. 31-28 – Yourhighness Morgan (Florida Atlantic Univ. Football)
Notre Dame v. Stanford – Stanford 38-35 – World B. Free (13 yr. NBA Veteran)
Florida State v. Florida – Florida State 31-30 – God Shammgod (former guard for Washington Bullets)
Texas A&M v. LSU – LSU 28-27 – Rusty Kuntz (1B Coach of your World Champion Kansas City Royals)
Oklahoma v. Oklahoma State – Oklahoma 33-31 – Dick Trickle (former NASCAR driver)
The Guru’s Take
No more streak for the Guru. Utah torched that possibility when it waited until after picks were in to rule out Devonte Booker. However, there is no time to dwell on last week – it’s rivalry week! There should be a plethora—not of pinatas, but of good games this weekend. One of the biggest will take place at The Big House, where Jim Harbaugh has immediately turned around the Wolverines’ fortunes in one season. If they win and Penn State somehow upsets Sparty, Michigan will even make the Big Ten title game. Either way, though, beating THE State Nut State University would be huge. Ohio State has dissention among the ranks, and while Elliot should see more carries this week, Michigan will be prepared. Expect a good old-fashioned slobberknocker…except with speedy guys. And expect the Wolverines to bring down the House.
Michigan 27, Buckeyes 24
James & the Swamettes
The Swamettes were tied up with their cousins, but James wanted you all to know that you might want to start paying attention to the Chiefs… Since the Royals finished and the Chiefs stopped staying up late to watch the boys in blue, the Chiefs are undefeated and have moved into playoff position! Time for another streak to end…
Bills v. Chiefs – Kansas City 24-21
Vikings v. Falcons – Minnesota 27-24
Happy Thanksgiving from The Swami’s family to Yours!